When I first arrived here, it was understandably difficult. I'd lived in Iowa all my life and since I was homeschooled, I spent a majority of my time at home with the family. So it was really, really hard to suddenly be thrust into a situation where I lived with fifteen guys who didn’t know a thing about cleaning, respecting privacy, and the relaxation watching HGTV provided. It was a whole new world (don't you dare close your eyes) and I was shell-shocked when I arrived.
This is not to say that the people weren't welcoming, because they were. I was very surprised by how nurturing some of the guys were. I needed truly nice people to surround me those first few weeks, people who understood the principal of privacy and homesickness...because we all know that when you’re homesick that you yearn for privacy. I was so homesick that first week! Showers consisted of me lathering myself in soap and daydreaming about Ankeny and its landscaped lawns. Dinner time mainly concerned me eating three or four apple slices, while wondering what all my friends back home were doing at that precise moment in time. I was so homesick the very first day, that when we went to the ocean I could not even comprehend what I was looking at. It could've been the Eiffel Tower or the Virgin Mary herself and I would've responded the same: big whoop, I want to go home.
But after those first few weeks, I began to feel somewhat at home in California. It's still a work in progress and I think it probably will be until the day I leave haha, but I’m getting used to being here. While it’s hard, I do I feel like I'm meant to be here. For those of you who watch 'Lost', Heartland is my island and someday I'll have to go back there, but for now, I'm content here...well not content in the sense that I'm happy or anything. More so, I know I'm supposed to be here, that I'm growing, and that if I were home I wouldn’t be growing like I am. So for now I'm in a happy medium: I don't like it here, I don't want to be here, but I'm willing to stay. Honestly, the holidays can't come quick enough.
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I knew that feeling...homesick, but soak it all in, bro. And when you come home, we'll welcome you with lots of open arms, hugs, coffee and laughs! miss you at Holy Ghost House meeting.
ReplyDeleteTry to enjoy it a little, though...I didn't get to enjoy IHOP as much as others for that reason. we couldn't take any road trips, and I didn't really relax into it there until right before it was over. so, enjoy...but not so much that you won't come back to us. we want you here!!! :) blessings, friend*
Thanks, Autumn! God is really helping me feel at home here...so I can relax haha as long as I know the holidays are around the corner.
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